Parting is such sweet sorrow.

So I told her, this morning.

Her; my mom.

She didn't take it too well. At least at first. That bit came as a surprise to me, I didn't think, or rather did not consider, that it would upset her, and not that much. Now, given time to pause and reflect... yeah I can see why it hurts.

I was the last of her hopes, in that sense. The last member of the family, besides her, who would faithfully go to church, serve and worship the same God, in the same place. That was the kind of family she hoped for. Now however, we all have left, or at least not regularly go, and the new absence of her most present hope has decided to leave for a while.

You see, I've decided to move to another church for a while. It wasn't an easy decision to come to, and the previous year was filled with awkward moments of hemming and hawing about how to let go of responsibilities, commitments, relationships. It took a while for the realization of my decision to sit in. And still, I feel that I've made the right choice. I need to break away for a while. Be challenged. Be confused. Be forced out of my comfort and walk a road less known. I need to grow in this aspect. As a side benefit I would hope to learn as much as I could about church organization from the journey I have embarked on; and with this knowledge, come back to my home and be a new, yet familiar, support.

I guess I didn't count on the impact my decision would make on those closest to me. Sure, my dearest friends do know, and they are...well, I guess they have come to terms with it? Heh. I just didn't know that the very same family I come home to each night would struggle with it as well.

Lord, you know, I know. Please comfort her in this time. In your name, amen.